&& I'm Better =)

[*Easier Done than Said*]
I've been gone for a while but I'm back ya'll!! Surprisingly things have been easier than I thought. In the beginning I thought that this was going to be one of the hardest things that I've ever done, but it's been very easy actually. I've been praying for motivation and strength to stay true to myself, by not talking to him. I totally cut off all communication with him and haven't talked to him since the day I told him that I didn't want to be his friend and I wanted to end all communication between us. Things have been smooth sailing since then. It really took me having to really sit back and realize that I was allowing myself to sit around and be sad, and what sense does that make? It's so crazy how much someone can grow in a matter of weeks! It hasn't been that long, but I've grown so much.. From time to time we end up being around each other and I will admit it gets hard not to laugh at the silly things that he does but, I hold my ground and manage to stay cool and ignore his presence haha!! 


I've realized that if someone doesn't fit, don't force it, and that's what I've been doing lately (trying to force things) and it's so not worth it. Love makes you do some crazy things, but your love for yourself can make you do things that will help you get out of what your love for someone else has put you in. It's taken so long for me to finally be able to say that I haven't thought about him, now don't get me wrong, sometimes I worry about him and wonder if he's doing alright, but that's been it, it's not like I sit and think about how much I miss him because I don't haha and it feels great to say that. 


[*Kickin' It..*]
Brandon and I hung out twice this weekend, and it felt good to be around him again. Whatever this is, a friendship whatever, I'm happy that we're sharing it together. Even though he doesn't want to have a relationship or anything like that right now, I can appreciate the time that we spend together regardless, because I have love for him and always will. Hopefully one of these days he'll come around ::shrugs:: who knows, but at least we're getting along! I'd rather have something than nothing at all. 


[*On to Other Things...*]
Band season is almost over! This season went by so fast!! OMG!! But I'm not trippin, I'm ready for it to be over with, I haven't had time do anything. Homecoming started today shoot me for normal people this week is supposed to be action packed and one of the best weeks of the year, WRONG!! For the band it means that the alumni are coming back and we're going to be busy learning a new field show, and all kind of madness. The good thing is, my mom will be in town on Friday so I'm happy cause I miss her and it's going to be good to see her, not to mention when she leaves, she's going to take all of this extra stuff home with her haha!! 


Well that's really it. I wish I had more to say but I don't :-x I just decided that I'd give you an update since my last one was written when I was in the middle of one of my emotional breakdowns and I don't want that to be the first thing that someone sees when they come to my blog. I haven't felt like that since that day. WOOO GO ME! lol 


Have you been staying positive? I've definitely been trying, and it helps!! Keep smiling!! 


SO dope. *